We so often hear about, or talk about, "making a difference." How does one go about "making a difference," and what sort of "difference" will that be? Do you stop and think about that at all whenever you say it or hear it, or is it just something that feels important but doesn't really go anywhere? What does that really mean?
To me, making a real difference in the world is to say something or do something that changes others' perspectives enough to have a positive impact on their lives, and one that is lasting enough to change a habit or a behavior pattern. God knows we can all use some of that in our lives, no matter who we are. What's amazing about that is that it doesn't even take that much. The late Leo Buscaglia, who wrote and lectured extensively on the subject of Love, and having an impact on others' lives, once wrote "For most of us, there will be no ticker-tape parades, no awards banquets or medals handed out. But if we only knew the good that can be done, and the ripple effect that can happen with the simplest act of kindness...even sometimes just a hug or a smile at the right time...we would all be heroes."
As I travel around the country and speak to various groups about "making a difference," I am always taken with the great amount of exuberance displayed by people when I talk about how powerful acts of kindness and compassion can be, yet I'm also stunned by how gripped with fear people are. Fear of failure, fear of sickness, fear of financial loss, of strangers or what might happen or not happen, etc., etc. We learn much of our fears from childhood, then magnify and increase them with everything negative that happens to us...compounded by the nightly news about the terrible things that happen to everyone else. Before long, we're so caught up in the negative things and the problems in the world, there's no room in our heads for anything positive. If anything positive manages to make it in there, it's quickly overshadowed by all the negative things that intimidate us and cause us to shrink back and believe that we can't make a difference in the world...or even in our neighborhood or home.
But that's not true. We can make a difference. We just did, in fact. We spoke out in the election with a very loud voice that we want to see and experience something different...not just different faces and different names but something that will go deep and overcome and transform the doubts, fears and resistance we've allowed to diminish the hopes, promises and dreams of our childhood. We lost all that...if we had it at all...because it became easier to believe the bad things.
Learning to be positive in a negative world isn't easy. It runs against the grain of the majority thinking, and few people want to be seen as someone running against the majority in anything. Yet, on the other hand, we all admire the hero that shows up in the nick of time and causes us to think about or to see things differently. Well, it's time to quit waiting for and hoping that that hero will show up. We can't put it on Barack Obama to be that hero for us. We each have to start being heroes in our own lives...one little bit at a time. We do that by deciding right here and right now that we're going to start being the hero we're looking for. In order to do that, we need to start telling the truth, being more accountable and setting the right example. If we really want to make a difference in the world, we need to be the difference we want to see in others. If enough of us do that, like we did in this election, think of the difference we might make in the world...really.
